MHammer113's Weblog

Final Portfolio

mhammer113 — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 21:52:45 +0000

your final portfolio will contain your research project elements [working or draft bibliography, thesis and abstract; revised bibliography, thesis and abstract; a minimum of ten printed out abstracts (with pages of any full texts of those abstracts that were the most useful) with the relevant parts highlighted, and documentation of your ILL account] and a cover letter analyzing your own research process as it developed over time; a letter analyzing your blog experience; your final revision of Essay 4 and its cover letter.

These are the things that need to be included in the final portfolio. I have a lot of these things accomplished except I do not have a final feedback on my Essay 4. Once I know this essay is ready to go I will write the cover leter and I should be almost done. Everything else is either save don my computer or is on my blog which I can recover easily. I plan on having everything done by Monday and if possible I will hand in my final portfolio either Tuesday or Wednesday.

Error Logs

mhammer113 — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:26:37 +0000

Date	Wrong	Corrected	Rule	Edit	Delete
2008-04-16	Another author that also shows technology as a positive controlled object is Kenneth Goldsmith who has written many books using the technology of the 21st century as a basis for his book.	Another author who also shows technology as a positive, controlled object is Kenneth Goldsmith who has written many books using the technology of the 21st century as his basis for the book.	I did not have the comma I needed and I also changed tenses by using that rather than who.	edit	delete
2008-04-16	Technology clearly has good implications when speaking of education however; Restak believes that technology is becoming out of hand is affecting the human brain.	Technology has clearly good implications when speaking of education however, Restak believes that technology is becoming out of hand, affecting the human brain.	This case I needed a comma rather than a semi colon and also need to add a comma in here along with taking out “is”	edit	delete
2008-04-16	“Our brain is being forced to manage increasing amounts of information within a shorter and shorter time intervals. Since not everyone is capable of making that transition, experiences like my patient’s are becoming increasingly common,” (Restak 46-47).	“Our brain is being forced to manage increasing amounts of information within a shorter and shorter time intervals. Since not everyone is capable of making that transition, experiences like my patient’s are becoming increasingly common” (Restak 46-47).	MLA format did not need the comma	edit	delete
2008-04-16	“The hardest part of her ordeal, as she expressed it, was that no one would give her more than a few minutes to tell her story. They either interupted her or, in her words,”gradually zoned out,’” (Restak 46).	“The hardest part of her ordeal, as she expressed it, was that no one would give her more than a few minutes to tell her story. They either interupted her or, in her words,”gradually zoned out’” (Restak 46).	MLA format did not need the comma	edit	delete
2008-04-16	This suggests that the people she was trying to speak to first all were showing cases of ADD solidifying Restak’s points that people show these signals more often now than ever before.	This suggests that the people she was trying to speak to first all were showing cases of ADD, solidifying Restak’s points that people show these signals more often now than ever before.	Needed a comma

I have realized that I have to be more careful with my usage of commas and semi colons. One thing I tend ot be good at is distinguishing the difference between there and their and its and it’s so that is good. One thing I know I need to work on is becoming less wordy and also staying in the same tense trying to eliminate “is”. Last semester I learned this can be a problem and that when my essay is done being written I should try to keep the passive sentences level under ten percent which I have been doing a lot better this semester compared to last.

Works Cited

mhammer113 — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 11:17:27 +0000

Gladwell, Malcolm. “Damaged.” The New Yorker 24 Feb. 1997.

Restak, Richard. “How the Modern Age is Rewriting Your Mind.” The New Brain. Rodale: Emmaus, PA. 38-62.

Restak, Richard. “More Images Than Ever: is it Destablilizing Our Brains?” The New Brain. Rodale: Emmaus, PA. 63-87.

The titles of the books should be underlined but i dont know how to underline on here.

Revision Plan

mhammer113 — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 11:26:04 +0000

The first thing I need to do is make sure the thesis statement is going to be the beginning of my abstract. The first time around I did not know if it was supposed to go at the beginning. The second thing I want to focus on is going back to look at the points you have made and the requirements made on the wrecursive green website just to make sure I am covering the right ideas. I think the most important thing to this is picking one of the most important economic issues in the next election which would certainly be healthcare or credit. I think this will allow me to shorten the abstract a little but also gather more specific ideas and keep the abstract flowing a little better. The first time around I tried to cover everything that was in the prompt and the problem with this was I found no easy way of showing both the democratic side vs. the republican. If i focus in more on one topic I will have the ability to show the difference in economic views between the Republicans and Democrats over the years and also in this upcoming election. After this is all done I can then get more in depth about who is the best candidate for the upcoming election when speaking of this specific issue. If I go in this direction I may also want to alter my thesis statement a little bit making it more specific to things I am going to bring up in the abstract. This will make the abstract less like an introduction paragraph.

Draft Absract

mhammer113 — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 11:47:19 +0000

Title : Technology: Not the Root of all Evil

Technology has become more advanced over the past few decades which according to Dr. Richard Restakhas gotten out of control however; Restak fails to realize how much technology has helped us evolve efficiently especially when relating to the ways it can be used to better our education. Technology has become a large part of my education this year more than any other year in my life. When talking about a university including 25,000 plus students it becomes effective to have the use of technology specifically computers to communicate with other students and teachers along with doing research for papers. Restak believes that the brain is becoming overloading causing problems such as ADD and ADHD, but the bottom line is that we would know nothing about the human mind to begin with without technology. Malcolm Gladwell explains this when he explains how the brain could potentially be solely responsable for serial killers thought processes. This is another use of technology in a positive way also incorporating technology. Another author who has done the same for me is Kenneth Goldsmith who has written his most recent books using the radio and newspapers which have all become more technoloically advanced and are imperitive to our education.

Introduction

mhammer113 — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 11:37:41 +0000

Write a paper in which you devise a possible correction to Restak’s “Problem of the Future” in relation to your personal use of technology and texts in relation to constructing a strategy to implement your own education, using Restak’s text and the work of at least one other author from this semester.

Has the world actually become too techonoligcally advanced for its humans? This point is argued by Dr. Richard Restak’s book “The New Brain”, specifically in chapters three and four. Restak believes that the world has become so technologically advanced the brain is having a difficult time evolving at the same rate leaving many humans behind and causing alarming rates of ADD/ADHD. Both ADD and ADHD have arguably been around for a long time, but with the new amounts of technology the amount of cases has risen and has starting inhibiting children at younger ages. Technology may be getting better every day and more advanced leaving the brain in turmoil yet the human has also gained a lot from the use of technology. Technology has become the reason why humans are able to live longer more efficient lives, travel around the world, and communicate with almost anyone along with many more things. Malcolm Gladwell has stated this in a few of his pieces most specifically, “Damaged” which uses technology to analyze the brain in understanding violence and rage in human beings. Another author that also shows technology as a positive controlled object is Kenneth Goldsmith who has written many books using the technology of the 21st century as his basis for the book. Both of these authors have been apart of my education this year in my freshman year in college because they have been accessable through the internet and researchable online making them intertwine with technology. Without really becoming aware we have become dependent on the use of technology to learn, read texts, and understand texts. Technology has become more advanced over the past few decades which according to Dr. Richard Restakhas gotten out of control however; Restak fails to realize how much technology has helped us evolve efficiently especially when relating to the ways it can be used to better our education.

Example Abstract

mhammer113 — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 11:13:30 +0000

While they formulate an elegant political economy model to explain the coexistence of an aging population and declining transfers, the resolution of the puzzle turns out to be much simpler. Labor tax rates and per capita transfers are negatively correlated with the dependency ratio in advanced economies only because this measure includes children as well as retirees. Both labor tax rates and per capita transfers in advanced economies are, in fact, historically positively correlated with the ratio of retirees to the working-age population and negatively correlated with the ratio of children to the working-age population. Increasing the number of retirees shifts preferences toward higher taxes and transfers by increasing the fraction of the population that receives transfers. In contrast, workers with more children prefer to spend more of their lifetime income while raising dependents, so they prefer smaller public pension systems. These results suggest that fiscal leakage from workers to retirees is not required to explain the broad trends in the transfer policies of advanced economies.

Question #3

mhammer113 — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 18:42:01 +0000

I believe technology is a good thing for the world, but there is a point where it gets rediculous. Technology is the reason why we currently have the longest life expectancy we have ever had and it is also the reason why I am writing this right now. Technology is every where and without it we would be stuck in the same world forever. Advancements have been a good thing, but there seems to be so much happening now it is making people lazy and is changing the way people are acting. People seem to have lost the real intentions of many technologies. For example when looking at the use of a cellphone; it used to be used just for emergencies and in the last ten years it has eveolved into a mini computer with internet and everything. This is the same when looking at computers which were designed to organize information and store sorts of files. The first computers had very small hard drives in which only small files could be fit on and small bits of information could be organized. Computers have evolved from that into machines that have huge hard drives and easy access to the internet, which has led to just as many problems as helpful things. People are stealing things with the use of computers and harassing others. If the world finds a way to control the use of technology we will be in good shape for a long time to come. Technology has been a big part of my education especially this year at FAU. Everyday I have to check my email or go on blackboard to check my grades or get information. I have to write essays on my laptop and be able to access the internet to write on blogs like I am right now. This has all been helpful in my education and without it we would be back in the stone age where it takes professors weeks to correct tests and longer times to get in contact with teachers and other students.

Question #2

mhammer113 — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 18:32:26 +0000

The role of texts is very important to our lives. The problem is it seems to be taking a backseat to many other things. We can a lot from the texts we view everyday. Another problem seems to be the way people look at texts and where they find them. People seem to rely on the internet which includes Wikipedia and search engines such as Google way too much. These places are a valuable source for good information, but sometimes the things you find have to be filtered in order to find the valid information. When it comes to writing texts I enjoy looking into a subject and using texts to write them.
I actually enjoyed the project we just worked on because I was able to look through texts I would have never viewed if it wasn’t for the project. On top of that I also looked in places where I didn’t think to look previous especially the library and the library database online. I was able to analyze a lot of different texts which allowed me to come up with an accurate answer to my prompt. With all the texts in front of me I was able to determine who I would want to vote for in the upcoming election for sure. This is a great example of how texts can be valuable to everyone out there however people rarely ever use them to their best use. It is almost certain that the next election people will go to vote on things they have heard on the news or a varitey of other random things. Not to say that everyone should research like I did, but this process could be duplicated with other problems.

Question #1

mhammer113 — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 18:23:31 +0000

Coming into my freshman year in college I felt as though I would be faced with huge textbooks, long readings, and 20 page essays. In some sense this has come true, but the educational value these hold is limited. For the most part kids arent going to sit down and read hundreds upon hundreds of pages from a textbook and this is why I have understood why professors in college do not necessarily do this. Many professors allow the student to find their own things and make their own study guides for tests and limit their role in helping the student along. This is a source of education in itself because it makes the student learn on their own and learn from their mistakes. For example in one of my first exams of the year I had a test in American Government and did terrible. This was because I was taking the wrong notes along the way. The second test I did better and with each test I got better until I finally got a high B on the final exam. Education over this past year for me has not just been in the classroom. An education can come from simply being put in new situations which is what happens your first year of college. I have especially learned a lot coming to school far away from home. This has been an education in itself. I have learned a lot in the classroom and even more outside of the classroom and I will use all of this knowledge to better myself in the future.